This month’s question is from a confused gal named Lori. She writes:

Sometimes I get jealous of my best friend because she has a new boyfriend. Now, I’m 26, I should be over feelings of jealousy. But I can’t help but get upset when she chooses him over me. I’ve never felt these feelings of jealousy before. I think I’m straight, but do you think my feelings of jealousy could mean that I might be a lesbian?

You’re not a lesbian! Jesus, if we could all claim that whenever a friend dumped us for a guy. Buck up, missy. You’re 26! Friends are supposed to dump you for people who make them cum and rub their feet. It’s what happens. Some people just get lucky early on in life and find someone else to snuggle with but you might not find your one for another two to twenty years! So you better start finding new things to do other than hang with your friends. It’s time to make your mark on the world so stop whining about what other people are doing and be a woman!